Two Ways of Looking at Happiness

Psychologically, there are two ways of looking at happiness. One is Hedonic. The other is Eudaimonic. The first option is the easiest. It’s a quick fix and a temporary solution. Think of a glass of wine with friends, splurging on a new outfit, or buying something you don’t need for your house. Hedonic happiness is short-term and fleeting. This can be unsatisfying and cause you to look for your next boost of pleasure to distract you from uncomfortable feelings.

Hedonic Pleasure

Hedonic pleasure has its place. It can help brighten your day and help you get through a bad one. Examples include getting a bonus at work, watching a movie you love, getting a massage, eating fabulous dessert, going to the hair salon, buying those boots you’ve been eyeing for weeks, or having great sex. There’s nothing wrong with this behavior if it’s not causing reckless spending or behavior, such as buying things you can’t afford or engaging in risky activities if you realize this type of happiness doesn’t last.

Eudaimonic Happiness

Eudaimonic happiness is a journey of growth and self-discovery that leads to long-term and lasting satisfaction. It’s about building your best life by setting goals, overcoming roadblocks, and realizing your potential as a human being. This process, while not always easy, is deeply rewarding. It involves identifying your beliefs and core values, understanding your strengths and weaknesses, and recognizing the connection between your thoughts, actions, and outcomes.

The journey to eudaimonic happiness may not always be comfortable, but the sense of achievement and fulfillment it brings is unparalleled. For instance, if you’re striving to lose weight, you might need to forgo immediate pleasures like dessert in favor of your long-term goal. Similarly, the joy of reaching a specific goal or mastering a skill, such as becoming fluent in a new language after months or years of practice, is a testament to the power of eudaimonic happiness.

Journal Exercise

If you are new to these concepts, you might want to journal about the topic. Make two columns. Label one hedonic and the other eudaimonic. Under the hedonic column, list behaviors you typically do when feeling sad, angry, or depressed. Be honest with yourself. Underline any of those behaviors that are risky, dangerous, or unsustainable. For example, if your job is stressful and you’re soothing yourself by drinking too much after work, underline that behavior. Once you’ve completed your list, move to the eudaimonic column and consider your long-term goals and how you want your life to be.

Do you want to raise a family or earn a degree? Do you want more meaningful work, to help others, volunteer, speak another language, or master a particular skill? Now, compare the two columns and circle any behaviors in the hedonic column that won’t help you attain your eudaimonic goals. Can you let these behaviors go, or could you benefit from some help? There’s no reason to struggle to get where you want to be. A happiness coach can help.

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Jan Fishler is a certified happiness coach and author. Her most recent books are Don’t Stop Now: Making the Most of the Rest of Your Life and 52 Ways to Be Happy: from the inside out. You can learn more at www.JanFishler.net.