Jan Fishler

Author and Happiness Coach

Writing Prompt: Write From the Heart

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A THOUGHT FOR TODAY:

The sense of wishing to be known only for what one really is is like putting on an old, easy, comfortable garment. You are no longer afraid of anybody or anything. You say to yourself, ‘Here I am — just so ugly, dull, poor, beautiful, rich, interesting, amusing, ridiculous — take me or leave me.’ And how absolutely beautiful it is to be doing only what lies within your own capabilities and is part of your own nature. It is like a great burden rolled off a man’s back when he comes to want to appear nothing that he is not, to take out of life only what is truly his own. -David Grayson, journalist and author (1870-1946)

I was wondering what to write about this morning and I saw this quote, which made me realize how important it is to write from the heart. I spent much of my writing career doing exactly the opposite. I wrote technical and training manuals, white papers, and scripts for corporate videos. It’s not as if this was a bad thing. It paid the bills and served me and my family for a significant period of time.  It was safe in the way writing about things rather than feelings can be.

To write about feelings or to write  from the heart, takes courage. It means not  being afraid of anybody or anything, and in many cases, telling your inner critic to pay attention to something else. Some of us are able to do this right out of the gate.  Anne Lamott, for example, did this in Operating Instructions, published in the late 80’s.  I remember reading about her experience of being a new parent and the loss of her best friend, and wishing I could put myself out there like that, something that took me another two decades to accomplish.

When some people read my memoir, they are astonished at how much I reveal about myself. I understand that this is something many people are unable to do. They are afraid to speak their truth, and I understand how that happens.  Years of conditioning by parents and peers about how we should or shouldn’t behave, stop us from speaking out or writing it down.

Often our truth is tied to our shadow side, and we are afraid that if people knew who we really were in all of our raw vulnerability, they wouldn’t love us anymore. In my experience, the opposite is true. The more you write from the heart, the more you speak and live your truth, the more love you receive.

Just for today, you might want to give it a try:  Write something from the heart.  See how it feels.

Writing Prompts

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Uncle Willie left his family in Poland when he came to America.

Writing prompts are a great way to begin your writing day, especially if you are writing a memoir or autobiography. Old photographs can be a great source of inspiration as well as a source of history. When my parents died, I became the keeper of photographs that had belonged to my grand parents and great grandparents.  I knew who some of the people were and the stories about them, but many were a mystery to me. In fact, when I was putting my website together, I used many of these photos–my grandfather in his World War I uniform, my father at twenty-one when he was in the Navy, my parents on their wedding day, my birth mother with my three older brothers, an unidentified couple, most likely a relative, from the 1800’s, and my cousin Mimi and I–all dressed up for some family function. In my memoir I wrote about many of these people, but this time, while digging through the box, I found photos that stirred up more memories. Old photos like the ones on my site, make great writing prompts.

A good example is the photo of Uncle Willie, my adoptive father’s, mother’s, brother–a relationship I never grasped until I saw a photo of the two of them. Uncle Willie died when I was young, but I remember parts of his story.  Uncle Wilie was born in Poland where he left behind a family when he came to America.  Because I was adopted, the fact that Uncle Willie left a family behind was not only a concern, but a source of unanswered questions. Why did he leave them? How many were there? What happened to them? In America Willie married Tillie, who for some strange reason didn’t like our family. Uncle Willie always came to family dinners alone, presiding over all of the Jewish rituals. Years after his death, when my mother’s mother was sick and in a nursing home, I finally met Tillie, who was also a resident. She was old, hunched and grey and very disinterested in meeting me.  Even though I don’t know all of the details, Uncle Willie’s photo evoked many memories from my childhood — all of which could easily become writing prompts in creating scenes about my life–like one of the family dinners, which were always a joyful occasion for me.

Because I teach memoir writing workshops, in addition to the process I developed to get people to quickly write scenes from their lives, I am always looking for additional ways to jump-start your writing.  Photos are my favorite writing prompts. If a box of old photos is handy, you might want to spend some time digging to see what memories you turn up.